We went to the motorcycle show this morning, and I saw something truly terrifying: The Geico gecko, showing off his nipple rings.



Here's a closeup:


My neighbor said, "Those aren't nipple rings - they're tiedown points!".

I bit my tongue.

I didn't see any bikes this year that I positively had to bring home. The new Buell is too tall, I'm never really going to buy a 'Busa, and the BMW sport tourer is just too expensive. That was reinforced for me when we went to pick up Mike's bike at the dealership (he was getting a GPS mount), and a guy pulled up on a week-old BMW, with road rash covering the entire left side of both his fairings and his leg. I don't think I'd want to survive wrecking a week-old $12,000 bike.

Anyway, we did see one cool thing at the motorcycle show - the perfect trailer: The Trailer In A Bag. We wanted a trailer for track days, but we don't even have enough space for the ones that fold against the wall. This looks like the perfect solution, and it's not unreasonably expensive. I'll probably order one when I get healed.

Tags: humor, motorcycle
Current Mood: exhausted

...some coworkers and I were talking about Simulated Reality - the idea that we're all living in a giant simulation and don't know it.

Kaitlyn was talking about how, if you could do a sufficiently good job of saving the state of the reality, the people inside it could be saved and restored without being aware of it. She pointed out that there are several things that point to the fact that this already happened - for example, the huge difference between the vengeful God of the Old Testament and the loving God of the New Testament.

"Ah!", I said, "God sold his account on eBay!"

Tags: geeky, humor, online gaming

Especially for googlecoder:

Louise was a wildly successful sauciér in France. Her sauces were widely praised, and she'd received several awards. But she wasn't happy, and went back to school to become a pastry chef.

She strugged in classes, and after failing Cakes 101, she came home to her family in tears. "Daddy, daddy, I just can't do this! I'm a failure! What am I going to do?"

He replied: "Lou, Lou, stick to the roux. Stick to the roux, my darling."

Tags: humor
Current Mood: giggly

Thanks to the delightfully evil kathygnome, I have a new City of Villains/City of Heroes account (on Virtue, if anyone who plays would like to say hi).

I'm playing a Technology Corruptor. Named "BufferOverflow".

Sometimes, I'm too geeky for my own good.

Tags: geeky, humor, online gaming
Current Mood: geeky

From a conversation in my office just now:

"You know, if 77% of a human is water, Run-Length Encoding would work really well to compress a person."

Tags: geeky, humor

Sparrow Aviation Administration Blames Collision On Failure To Detect Pane Of Glass
Mysterious Phenomenon Kills Millions Each Year

Tags: humor
Current Mood: giggly

So I'm at the gym this morning, and they've got the radio on.

It's playing Greenday's Wake Me Up When September Ends. My first thought: "Ooh, it's a song about UseNet!"

Tags: geeky, humor
Current Mood: amused

My new cast iron frying pans. I know, you're supposed to buy them used at a yard sale, or get them from your grandmother, or something like that. I found the set of 3 for $7 at Harbor Freight Tools. Anyway, I've had them for months, but I took them out of the box for the first time tonight. That's when I found the warning label.
Yes, this cookware might get hot. And just how am I supposed to cook in them with the label there? In blatant violation of the label, I removed it, and they're now in the oven, getting hot, and seasoning. I'm sure something bad will happen to me later.

Tags: cooking, humor

( Geek wedding ceremony )

Tags: geeky, humor

ATC to random pilot: Cessna 1234, cleared for the VOR/DME 18, report established inbound on the arc.
Me to Michael: Wow, it must really be raining down there.
Michael: Oh?
Me: Well, approach just told him to "report established on the arc".

Tags: flying, humor
Current Mood: amused

Andy Ihnatko's 24-hour audio book

I'm 32 minutes into it. It's great so far...
Ed: Finished it. It only got better.

Download it. Listen to it. Enjoy the phrase "Lesbian-themed PowerPoint clip art"....

Tags: humor
Current Mood: amused

"Sendmail administration is not black magic. There are legitimate technical reasons why it requires the sacrificing of a live chicken." - Unknown

Tags: geeky, humor
Current Mood: aggravated

We're watching Airport 1975. I'd never seen it before, although, of course, I've seen Airplane lots of times. It's terrible.

Trivia from IMDB:

The small plane which (in the movie) collides with the 747, a Beechcraft Baron, tail number N9750Y, was destroyed in a midair collision with a Cessna 180 over Tracy, California, on Aug 24, 1989.

( NTSB report here )

Tags: humor
Current Mood: amused

So I'm installing fortune, and this conversation happened:

[15:29] Me: Am I a "fun-loving system administrator"?
[15:29] Morris: in the BOFH kind of way?
[15:29] Me: I'm not sure.
[15:30] Morris: context?
[15:30] Me: Fun-loving system administrators can add fortune to users' .login files, so that the users get their dose of wisdom each time they log in.
[15:30] Morris: *laugh*
[15:31] Me: If I was more fun-loving, I'd patch it into mime-defang, and add a quote randomly to every email that went out, if it didn't already have a legal .sig.
[15:31] Me: _THAT_ would be the work of a real BOFH.
[15:31] Morris: *laugh*

Tags: geeky, humor
Current Mood: amused

Now that's a real hardware failure...

> You can't. When receiving mail from a POP3 mailbox, the SMTP
> envelope is missing, so you won't be able to determine the
> correct local user. Use something else that preserves the message
> envelope, i.e. UUCP, ETRN, ATRN, ..

Before the server that is collecting the mail died it was able to determine
the localusers when connecting by POP3.
The trouble is the hardisk caught on fire and so the files are not
recoverable.

Tags: geeky, humor

I so have to stop putting off this design document. I've now written it in haiku:

baselining sucks now;
after major redesign,
should be much faster

process on disk;
reading into memory
just wasting space

data in sql -
index by primary keys,
process in order.

each row is compared
against the current row in
the other table

if less than, an add
if greater than, a delete
if equal, a change.

Tags: geeky, humor
Current Mood: dorky

roses are #FF0000
violets are #0000FF
all my base
are belong to you

In other Valentine's Day news, Godiva chocolate and tulips rule.

Also from ThinkGeek: HTTPanties.

And, in a random act of bravery, I ordered my very first two-piece (tankini, but 2-piece none-the-less) bathing suit from Decent Exposures today. Purple top, black bottoms.

Tags: humor, randomness
Current Mood: cheerful

Rec.humor.funny hasn't been the same since Brad Templeton left. But today's post was wonderful:

From: engrpax@earthlink.net (Paxton Starksen)
Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny
Subject: Gourmet Bargains (True)
Followup-To: rec.humor.d

I was browsing for Japanese kanji symbols, and the site I went to was
sponsored by those ads that try to take advantage of what they think you
might also be interested in; one ad by eBay said:

"Japanese Sushi Sale, New and used Japanese Sushi. Check out the
deals now! eBay.com"

I'll pass.

Only in Japan.

Tags: humor
Current Mood: chipper

(part 3)

Mango Ceylon, today:

Tags: humor
Current Mood: tired

People who use challenge-response systems on their email should be beaten over the head with a clue-by-four.

(If you beat them over the head with a golf club, would that be a clue-by-fore?)

Tags: geeky, humor